5. Book that doesn’t belong to me – Danny by Chancery Stone
I acquired this from my dear friend Marika. I’m not clear where she herself had come across it, but I have a dim recollection that it was either given to her by Kim Newman, or a porn producer. Either way, she was planning on getting rid of it, so I swiped it. The book is the size of a farmhouse load, and I thought I might need a doorstop.
If you’ve never come across Chancery Stone, do some googling. A nutcase of the purest form, she responds vitriolically and hilariously to her many detractors on her self-named website, Chancery Is God. She believes her (now five volume) Danny series is the second coming of the Marquis de Sade. What it actually is is 4000 pages of repetitive, soulless, incestuous cowboy twink porn. It’s not even much use as one-handed material once you get past the first twenty pages and the existential desolation sets in.
Also in the running: Glass Book of the Dream Eaters, also recommended by the above wench. It’s dreadful. I’ve been told to wait for the airship battle. It will probably happen over 300 very slow pages. She, meanwhile, has my copy of Looking For Alaska. I feel she wins in this instance.